those little things in love and life...

except for the title..this has got nothing to do with the book by the same name....
this post is coming a bit too soon but i have to...i just have to right..NOW....
its about a girl..the first thing you notice about her..she is fat..the next thing you notice..the confidence that overshadows every other thing..

i think i couldn't have given har a better beginning....however...

we met...and there certainly was nothing like "..and the rest is history".NO. ours was a gradual one...first i hated her..then i envied her..finally i loved her.
i failed to read between the lines..i failed to fathom those unspoken words...but time came to the rescue...i saw the person..the brutal honesty..the different take on things..the uncompromosing attitude..the capacity to bottle up stuff...the sincerity...may be she finally showed herself to me...

i envied her for so many things...i envied her because she was so..so close to perfect *of course no one should be perfect*...i envied her for being the right balance of fun and maturity...i envied her because i wanted to imbibe few of these things from her...

it has been a little more than two years that i have known her...and today all the envy has vanished...i dont want to be like her...because i cant be like her...each one of us is unique..no doubt...but she is DIFFERENT...totally

this is something i wrote:-

shez strong az iron yet soft az cotton.....determined az d mountains yet baffling az d sea.....lively as a bunch of sunflowers yet serene az a solitary white tulip......she reasons like d logic of a seasoned philosopher but shez confused like a child at a candy shop......she camouflages better than a chameleon n she opens up her bare heart to you.....shez bears responsibility with d dedication of a devotee n shez a riot of colours when shez in a jovial mood......she inspires...she motivates....she soothes....she advises...she helps....she instills positivity...she infuses morality....she leads....she enjoys...she gets tired too....but den she gathers her spirits n stands up tall coz she let d world know dat shez strong az iron.
daz d various facets of bein the teddy...daz bein a phenomenon called PARUL ALOK.
turned out t b smthng vry different frm wat i was plannin 2 rite....
gud luk 2de n always
P.S. i love you

this is how she replied:-

miss ur coffee… miss ur coconut ladoos …miss ur gettin scred at small thngz… miss ur nt eatin fud nd gettin scoldin frm us… miss ur writin nice stuf in klass nd trustin nd givin me to read it… miss ur nt movin ass frm ur bed …miss sleepin vid u …miss discussin songz vid u…. miss ur quick bathz dat u used to take… miss ur… shit happens nd u move on attitude …miss ur smile …miss ur silently gvin me all d space dat i needed ….miss ur counsellingz d most................i dunno if u nd i hve ever been very close or nt but still miss d relationship v hd.........it was different nd i treasure it nd i will always remembr u for wat v had.........i miss d relationship a lot.

these little things in love and life......so trivial..yet so meaningful

pic of my life

whoever has a knack for photography invariably has a pic which he/she labels as the pic of life. it might be a pic of their own in happy or pensive mood or jus something clicked by them and very close to thier heart.the one right above is wat i call the pic of my life.not clicked by me but defines me in ways more than one. on a very random night, my roomie-anyone who shares my hostel room wud be my room-mate but i shall always have just one roomie.so my roomie clicked this pic n i flicked it from her. no matter in whatever frame of mind i am in..this one pic i can always relate to- a mere speck in this big world,a fighter and survivor against all odds,a silent observer,a loyal companion.....may be this is my perspective of my own self.

this day..that year

sitting here on my bed,with the cool monsoon winds brushing past my hair,my mind drifts back to the past one year. Last year on this very day,life changed-for better and for worse. some told i was heading for greener pastures..some of them out in all their effort in holding me back but i left.i left the place that gave me everyhting beyond my expectations.my first hostel room,first ragging,first fresher's,first roomie....et all. Today,in retrospect,i see for myself that i have traversed a long way....i have undergone a metamorphosis,have become a little more fit to survive in this insensitive world.But at the same time i have found happiness.i have absolutely hated this place for the past year for reasons best known to me but now i think this is my first step towards accepting things the way they are. i have fumbled n i shall fumble but as said HOLLY-" in the meantine..life goes on"